She press the plus button on her
headphone ‘till reaching the maximum volume, Voltures-John Mayer, suddenly
she’s smiling, she remember someone, someone who love this song much. Then she
realise this guy hasn’t replying her messages, she opened their chatroom and
she’s wondering what is the next topic this guy will choose, cause their chat
actually never ending, last time it’s 3 weeks non-stop-chat. But somehow she
knows, sooner or later their chat will be end soon. She take a deep breathe and the smile before is
already fade away. “Well, I gotta let go.” She’s whispering to her own self.
“
I have an exam tomorrow so I need to forget this stupid love shit and focus on
studying. ”
She open her book and read all the
words there carefully. But, then she stop. Her thought fly trought something.
She can feel that her eyes already wet, she take another deep breathe, deep
heavy breathe. She’s wondering about a year ago, this guy was nothing to her,
just her ex. That’s it. Well, now it’s kinda hard and hurt to explain. If She
had to write a book, she’ll write about him, how he come and gone how he being
so important and being no one in her live. Yeah, that’s what he done. She know him
almost for my whole life time, elementary school, 4th grade, She's too young to
falling in love, but She knows She does.
For
the very second baby I already know, I’ll end up head over heel in love with
you.. Turns out I’m right. kryptonite-
Guy Sebastian suddenly played . She close her eyes and think, “is he love me?”.
Now she know, how does it feel when brain lossing it’s function because heart
started to work. When people said ‘leave’ but heart still ignoring it. He’s
coming back a year ago, telling her that she actually never leave his mind,
even only with a word, she believe it. She’s seeing something in his words,
that’s not a pretty word he choose, but it’s feels like she know that he’s
sincere. So they meet a couple times before the distance take them apart, This
boy is leaving the hometown due to schoolarship he got. At first, She doesn’t
care about distance, but somehoe something suddenly killing her, not the
distance, Timing.
The timing is really not for her. She’s
close to some-other-man with different character, in fact, the on she love is
just this one. because of that damn timing, she took a wrong step and left him,
the one she’s really love. But deep down Inside, everynight after that wrong
step she’s really regreting her step. “I Should’ve wait longer, I took a wrong
step.”
She finally realize, it’s not something
about always be with him, but let him be happy with or without her is the goal
of falling in love. But he never answer the question about his happiness, he
always said that he shouldn’t have to tell her cause she is already know, but
she don’t know. And it’s killing her.
So finally she’s walk away. She’s
hoping for his happiness. All she know is, if he’s not happy, he’ll come to
her, but he need to tell her, that he’s not happy.
